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Parents and Checking In


It’s a blessing to have two loving parents in your life. When you don’t live in the same community as your mom or dad, it is easy to get busy and forget to call them. I can speak to this challenge from personal experiences.

I am guilty of hyper-focus on my work and family responsibilities. Of course, there is always something going on, but I need to make more time to disconnect from the island and connect with my parents.

Since moving abroad five years ago, I have tried to return to the States at least once a year. When the pandemic hit, I decided to stay put and canceled all my traveling plans. It's been two years since I sat on an airplane.

This week a picture popped up on my Facebook wall, and it reminded me of my last trip to the States with a photo I posted two years ago.

Thankfully, my parents made the trek from Los Angeles to Antigua last week. They spent five days with us to relax and reconnect. We ate out at restaurants, hiked a short trail, walked on the beach, and shopped for some household items on their dime!

I enjoyed their visit, and it forced me to recognize the need to get home more often.

My dad is 70, and my mom is 69. We missed my dad's big birthday bash over the summer due to covid and international travel concerns. Regardless of the latest strand, we plan to attend my mother's party in 2022.

Are your parents still living? How often do you see or talk to them?

I try to Facetime my parents once a week. On most weeks, I meet this goal, but there are occasions when I miss the mark and don't pick up the phone. Of course, any excuse from working on a writing project to running various errands validates my forgetfulness to call home, but I know I need to be more consistent.

My mom received a health scare with a breast cancer diagnosis a couple of months ago. Give thanks to God, the doctors caught it early at stage 0, but the road to recovery is not over. Our family appreciates your prayers as she contemplates her treatment options and listens to multiple professional opinions.

Given my mom’s condition, the time we shared last week was cherished and amplified at a different level.

Life happens in seasons. At some point, we experience the bliss of spring, summer, and a cool autumn morning. That's when things are going well with our health, family, finances, and profession. But, unfortunately, we also have to go through winters when challenges in multiple areas of our lives will test our internal thresholds.

When it gets tough, we can figure out how to press through or fold in the pressure. I’m all about perseverance. Together my family and I will navigate the storms of this season.

If you or a parent of yours is going through a difficult moment, know that you have it within you to adjust and manage whatever comes your way. So take a few minutes now, well after you finish reading the last two sentences of this post, and make plans to see a parent or parent figure in your life. With the latest virus variant, school shootings, and continued challenges of underserved communities, we must realize that each day with our loved ones is a blessing.

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Thwarted in one goal and having to turn to another will hopefully mean opening a door we needed to open but were unsure of earlier. Take each lesson as a step forward, and give thanks for not having to repeat old mistakes.


Excellent advice you are giving, Dr. Lindsay. For us, whose parents are no longer living, we know, to have parents is a wonderful thing that needs to be nurtured with love.

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