Discipline, Gratitude, Sacrifice

---

Do they want you home? Yes. Would you like to be home more often? Absolutely.

Yet the pull of passionate, meaningful, and purposeful work keeps you away. 

I know this dilemma too well. It stirs internal conflicts, cooks destructive thoughts, and serves plates of frustration.

Sometimes, I eat challenges and digest gratitude. I have moments when I also take on too much and vomit the excess.

Lost or disgusted? Read on for context.

The Umoja Community Education Foundation held its 21^st Annual Conference last week. Over one thousand participants traveled to the San Jose McEnery Convention Center to attend workshops, strengthen teams, build networks, and engage in various activities. I helped with logistics and led presentations.

Before twelve-hour workdays began, I wrote in my room, exercised in the hotel gym, or ran outside.

Discipline

I facilitated four sessions. Two covered culturally responsive teaching strategies, and the others discussed the craft of writing in liberation.

The workshops, Journaling for Power: Writing for Freedom, attracted groups of students and teachers. By sharing stories and the benefits of journaling, I encouraged and equipped attendees with the tools to develop writing practices. Each attendee received a notebook and a pen.

During the sessions, we created gratitude lists. While they listed the names of people, things, ideas, and experiences, I set a two-minute timer, played music, and wrote in my journal.

I am grateful for sitting still and writing. I am grateful for this moment…

After writing these two sentences in my journal, the pen moved across the pages for five more minutes. I described the participants as they engaged in the activity.

Each session ended with time for questions, an evaluation, and feedback. Some asked about publishing, others discussed their perspectives on creative writing and freedom.

After everyone left, I inhaled deeply and exhaled. Both sessions followed my lesson plans, with space for improvisational teaching, or as the foundation defines it, Live

Learning. I smiled as I reflected on the workshops’ successes.

Gratitude

Our team met the evening after my presentations. We discussed the day and clarified additional duties. After ten hours, I wanted nothing more than food and sleep, but I grabbed something to eat and attended the talent show, where I witnessed students share their talents in a loving and welcoming environment.

One of the students who attended my writing workshop shared a quote I had read earlier. Then she recited a poem about the systemic assault on Black bodies. The moment took me back to the days when I shared poetry at open mic events in Chicago.

Listening to the students’ words confirmed purpose, meaning, and impact.

Sacrifice

To be there and contribute to the team, I couldn’t also be home. For four days, we worked long shifts to deliver a memorable event.

Success in familial and professional spheres requires the ability to juggle. You can’t drop the ball on either responsibility. If you hold only one role in your hands, failure is inevitable. 

Time offers us the blessing of improving in the art of living.

Life is a puzzle. Like the title of Pharrell’s documentary, “Piece by Piece,” our daily decisions determine progress. It’s up to us and our community to put the pieces of our lives together.

We should encounter challenges to test our endurance, character, and willpower. Understanding which options to select and which to disregard requires patience, mentorship or jegnaship, experience, and humility.

I don’t always get it right, but I am grateful for every moment to learn and correct mistakes.

Yes, my wife wants me home.

Yes, my children want me home.

Yes, I want to be home.

But sometimes I must leave, and it’s okay.  

The morning after I returned from the conference, I woke early to write and participate in a 20-mile race. Making time for exercise and a daily practice of gratitude helped produce the perspective in this blog post.

Now What?

Are you experiencing similar challenges? Try writing a gratitude list and committing to an exercise goal to help release the tension between personal and professional goals. If you’re lacking motivation and drive, subscribe to this list for weekly blog posts written to equip you with tools to help you reach your potential.

 Support my work and yourself by buying a book, contributing to The Keep Vernon Writing Fund, or enrolling in coaching services.